I feel for you….
You lied and you deceived. Used every trick at your disposal to achieve your goal and you just about did. You almost left me for dead.
But 10 years on, in your pinterest “memories” you still can’t seem to let go and still seem so determined to justify yourself while, out in the open for my children to see, you insinuate all you did 10 years ago.
But it’s interesting to read that, just two days ago, you still seem to be needing help to believe you deserve better! Wow! After 10 years of the greatest love of your life and happiness which knows no bounds, I’d hardly think you’d still be needing that help. Or is it – could it just be – that your heart still dwells elsewhere than where you are? Of course, you’d never admit to that but such a post and comment is not the post and comment of someone who has moved on so many years ago and is blissfully happy. Yes Julz, you know I was particularly good at a little psychology and especially reading and knowing you my dear. It’s just a damned pity you cannot be honest with yourself with him and with everyone else around you. If you could, it’s amazing how things could change! But you never had the strength for such integrity.
I DO feel for you Julie because I know you. I knew you better than anyone ever did (even more than your own family and your new family and friends) because I spent 20 years of your life with you. And, contrary to the meme you post, I never walked away and never would have. You see, my vows WERE sacred to me and I loved you. You were a wonderful woman and wife and mother for such a long time. Right to the end. And, right to the end, you had everyone believe your garden was rosy – even me. It is so sad you were obviously living a lie even in your own mind.
If you ever were to read this blog Julie, don’t complain that I have posted this. After all, it is already posted on a public forum for the world to see and read (including our children). All I do here is provide a commentary to it.
I find it most telling Julz. It’s now 10 years you know. 10 years since YOU (not I) decided to walk away so that section of the meme just doesn’t hold water. And neither does the rest.
I (assuming I am the “narcissist sociopath” which is obviously what you’re getting at) chose you because you were/are brilliant, bright, compassionate and caring? Let’s consider that statement for a moment Julz. YOU see yourself as “brilliant, bright, passionate and caring”? Perhaps you have even been told that is what you are but you readily accept it obviously. That takes an ego and some amount of narcissism itself to make a statement like that about oneself does it not? And here am I. I’d never think of stating that about myself and yet I am the “narcissist”? Hmmmm.
That said, I did choose you not because I saw you as brilliant or bright (not saying you weren’t either but that was not the reason) but because you were cute, fun and loveable and yes passionate and, at the time I THOUGHT – caring. I’m not going to dissect all of that now because it would take a book. I’m just concentrating on your meme as it is.
I chose you because of the qualities I lack? No… wrong again. I chose you because we got along and I perceived you as a beautiful human being. Nothing more – nothing less. My low self esteem and fragile ego? Quite incredible really. 20 years and two beautiful daughters, a substantial career and a lifestyle for you all that most would only dream of – provided by a guy with a fragile ego and low self esteem while, during the split and divorce, it was all about my “huge ego”, “arrogance” and all which is opposite to low and fragile. I can’t keep track Julz. First it’s left then it’s right. Down then up. Night and day, dark and light. But, if I chose you for all these things, were you so blind (Ahh love IS blind they say don’t they?) that you couldn’t see all of this in the beginning? It took 20 years and two kids to recognise it?
You defeated the “monster” with YOUR “beautiful heart”? Wow! Where is this brilliant, bright, passionate, caring, beautifully hearted woman? I’d love to meet her! LMFAO!
Julz 2006: Writes an affidavit to the court talking about her husband having a girlfriend (or girlfriends) – when, in fact, she was now living with the guy with my kids who SHE had the affair with which broke up the damned marriage and is now married (as a bigamist) to – but then states in her email she has not told our kids this lie. No Julz, you didn’t because, as you now know – although they will never absorb the full substance of it = the kids KNOW it was YOU having the affair! Why? Because you, ever so suddenly, decided you wanted out but you needed something/someone to “jump ship” to. You needed to maintain the “ex pat” lifestyle and have some other jerk make sure you were financially taken care of. It was a bit unsure for a while whether you’d be able to bring it off though so, while that state of being unsure about your future remained, you went for the financial “jugular” to try and ensure you got everything (100%) from me. Plus, you worked that body honey to ensure you trapped the german! Congratulations on the latter! 😉 Yes it was about maintenance and ancillaries to you and every single lie you could put into an affidavit helped along that path. Your email back to me (had I had a gf at anytime at all) would have been quick to have stated “You liar!” but it didn’t did it? Why is that? Because you knew it was you lying. If you had said it to the kids then they would have wanted to know who and details. Who and details you didn’t have! But the court never asked you for details to back up your statements did it? I wonder why that was? Could it have been due to the court being happy to just suck your husband dry financially while you had the benefit of the Singapore Woman’s Charter and the knowledge they would happily sling me in jail for refusing to do as I was told?
A “beautiful heart”? You’ve got to be joking! But I do believe, as your brother once suggested, that you hit a brick wall mentally and emotionally and that you experienced some form of early menopause just as your mother had. All those vitamin supplements you took perhaps didn’t help much then. As for fragile ego and low self esteem. My darling woman, I was not the one who would go on and on about wrinkles or stretch marks due to our babies – NEITHER of which bothered me in the slightest but, by god, it bothered you! I always wondered why it would when your husband didn’t care? Ah but then you’re a woman and a woman who needed to feel she was still Cameron Diaz! While you wanted them removed, I’d kiss them! That’s the sort of “Monster” I was!
To: “Earthling” (24/12/2006)
You know cant you just piss off. If there is any more
emails they are going straight to the lawyer. We are
divorced, get over it..It is no longer what he said
she said. Its about maintenance and ancillaries.
Do not reply to this email but be assured i have not
suggested anything of the sort to your kids. As for
affadivit you need to remove all the lies from yours!
But frankly its water off a ducks back…Its over as i
said its about the finance, its about you being a
providing father and the rest is history. There is
nothing to takein court as you say its about the
money. MOVE ON grow up and stop being an ass.
I tell your kids no matter what you love them. Always
have always will. I just spoke to katie and she showed
me the whole conversation you had…?????? what the
hell are you on about. Perhaps you need to stop being
seen with a different one in coffee bean. Do you know
they see you or you are seen there every day! So think
on that. I could give a shit but for them they dont
like it. And as katie tried to tell you quite clearly
what she doesnt like. But you never listen, you never
have and that is why you are where you are today.
This letter is threatening and if there is any more I
swear it will be used to show your true
character.!!!!!!!!!!????????? So think on
To Julz (23/12/2006)
YOU are gonna PAY for this sometime somehow!
1. IF you have (which you MUST have) even SUGGESTED to
my kids that I had ANY girlfriend ANY where at ANY
time during our marriage YOU will PAY for that! Coz I
had NO-ONE NEVER AT ANYTIME NOT EVEN A SNIFF OF A
GIRLFRIEND ANYWHERE DURING 20 BLOODY YEARS! COZ I
LOVED THEIR MOTHER!!!!
YOU had BETTER think of a good way of getting that
TRASHY lYING CRAP about a girlfriend out of your
recent affidavit. MARK MY WORDS MY KIDS ARE NOT GOING
TO BELIEVEYOUR CRAP.
2. After speaking with Katie just now, it seems their
whole remembrances of me circles around YOUR words in
YOUR affidavits. YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS GIRL!!!!
3. THAT’s why we’ve come to this……………….ALL
OF YOUR GODDAMNED LIES!!!!! I’ll take it in court – no
issue – BUT you’ve crossed the line BIG TIME if u have
our kids even REMOTELY believing their father CHEATED
on their mother when in fact the cheat is YOU!
MY children have no problem with their language…just
chinese! So if you think different then perhaps that
is your influence not mine
You dont even have the balls to face me! To meet me !
or to take my calls! So get a life ! Leave me alone.
The kids …i would say happy…Peter just bought
hannah an early birthday present ..a gorgeous phone
and phone plan cos guess what her dad dont pay for
hurt,,,i bloody well hope so.
I really think you need to advise our children on the
language they are using these days don’t you?
Subject: RE: mw
Date: Thu, 9 Nov 2006 22:36:33 +0800 (CST)
>Save face…. i could not give a shit… about
>You dont even know me .
>Unless you have anything of any consequence to say
>then fuck off.
>Personally, I don’t give a rat’s arse what you think
>any longer. As for your “me strong… you no f**k
>me” stuff. YAWN! You lost your mind as soon as you
>walked out the door. BUT you CAN’T admit that can
>To him, me, friends, family….no-one. Coz u need to
>I wish you could see how I honestly (absolutely
>honestly) feel sorry for you. It’s so sad. Your
>predecessor was such a sweet woman.
>Date: Thu, 9 Nov 2006 22:29:40 +0800 (CST)
> > oh i guess i hit a sore point mw63 …dont fuck
> >me … you have seen nothing yet.
> >God you cant even hold a adult conversation with
> >me…how the hell did you think we could meet?
> >As for crucifiying you …I do wat it takes for my
> > But i am glad you get some satisfaction that
> >man is paying and supporting your daughters….
> >Personally i think you have no balls,
> >Good night
Yes, another man was paying for my girls and why? Because my girls’ mother had stolen £35,000 from their father out of the bank stating one minute only she had the password because it was all her money and the next stating she had to change the password (stupidly – because that is what an incessant liar is and they can’t keep track of their statements) to stop me from accessing it. She then sends the majority to accounts in her Inspector of the Police’s father’s name and also an account in her brother’s name (and these two fuckwits wonder why I’d never utter a decent word to them again?) which is “MONEY LAUNDERING” by a member of the British Police no less! Well what a fucking surprise that is eh? Furthermore, the “other man” had, effectively, stolen my children from me while their mother led the children to believe he was just a friend and he was actually funding the children’s mother to screw their father through court because he was of the impression that he was going to be joint owner with the children’s mother, of a £500, 000 house in Surrey which, by the way, the children’s mother had taken him to and introduced to our tenants he as being me! Yes, you read that correctly. When I turned up a couple of years later when I returned to the UK, the tenants said to me “You’re not Mr X, Mr X is a german!”. The look on their faces when I showed them my passport was a picture!
So anyway, back to the meme….
“So he has to move on to a weaker woman”?? Errr.. wrong again my darling! But then that’s no longer any of your business. 🙂 I’d just say one thing more – “He” didn’t jump ship in desperation to have someone take care of him financially. Even though “he” was down to fumes! YOU, however….. Poor guy. He shall never admit to himself he was a meal ticket!
“Tolerate his lies and abuse”? You see, this is where I really take exception. By posting all of this crap in this meme and making your comment as you have, you STILL have our children believe that – though they lived through a very happy marriage between their parents – somehow must believe that “in some darkened corner when they weren’t looking”, their father abused their mother in some way! Nothing could be further from the truth and the thing is – you KNOW it! And that is what I cannot ever forgive Julz. I wish you no harm and I wish you happiness but what you did, have done and are still doing (TEN YEARS ON) is promulgating a total myth! And it is a myth which has absolutely destroyed my relationship with my two daughters who I love. Not only that but you made sure you destroyed their relationship with the rest of my family who never hurt a hair on their head!! (Neither did I by the way – nor yours!)
You see, while your father and mother ultimately later made statements against me (incredible fabrication with no supporting evidence by the way and done because they were scared of the steps you would take if they didn’t support you 100% – e.g. as your mother told me “We were afraid we wouldn’t see the girls again” (ah but they’re ok with me and my family not seeing them eh?) ) – this is what they originally had to say (and your brother too). Strange when “he” was meant to have been so abusive in a domestic, emotional, sexual or physical way isn’t it?
Back to the meme:
“Keep your integrity and heart intact”? – I DARE you to! I dare you to follow your integrity and your heart! You don’t have the inner strength to yet, if you did………
“This evil man chose to walk away from you…. fake personality” : Wow! 🙂 You walked not I. I never would. And fake personality? Come on now Julzy honey, who’s the fake? 😉 You couldn’t even begin to think about making up an example of my “fake personality” because, once more, you know THAT is absolute tripe! The problem I had – as you well know and would always tell me to “stop telling people so much” – was that I was as open as a book! Watch out though because I’m even more so these days. In fact, I’m extreme! 🙂
“What an amazing testimonial to your potential and spirit”. Really? What have you made of that potential darling? Is it the potential to live off another guy? Or have you now achieved something extraordinary or, perhaps, have a career which has launched you into financial independence? Yes you had potential and you had spirit, you just allowed it all to be seduced by the dark side.That potential and that spirit could have had our children grow up happy and content knowing they had a mother and father who were seriously together (as their vows once suggested would be the case – although for the kids, well, as they said “it happens all the time dad get over it” – MY kids would never have said that but YOURS did!
You fell in love (if you know what love is that is) NOT with an illusion but with something quite the opposite. What you couldn’t handle was the reality!
Or, yes, perhaps you DID fall in love with an illusion but the illusion then would have been of your own making! Perhaps you’ve done the same thing again? 😉
By the way it is “THERE are far better men….” not “THEIR…” but you wouldn’t have noticed that would you? Anyhow, I’m sure there are. I never promoted myself as perfection. All I promoted myself as was someone who thought you were to him!
But when he put his foot down on the very odd occasion he had to, boy did he feel the cold siberian winter flow right through him!
He lied once to you and he apologised for it. He never lied again. Yet since he’s had time to look back, he’s realised and remembered just how many lies you told him about a myriad of things and the lies started from the very start!
And YOUR fragile ego and low self esteem when, even in the earliest days when i had to go on trips to Scandinavia with a certain (ugly, boyish like) female engineer, YOU would take fits! I used to laugh (and perhaps you didn’t like that) because to me, the thought that you would feel threatened by her (or anyone) cracked me up! But then you did feel threatened. Even to the point of having to dictate to me who my secretary would be in the Philippines! I was even honest enough to tell you that some I interviewed would actually state that they would “do anything the boss wanted” during or after work hours! Yet did I stray? DID I HELL!
And the last one is a cracker: “Unresolved emotions”.
1. My father left us when I was about 5 years old and one night, on my early 40s, I got emotional watching a movie about something like that BECAUSE I HAD EMPATHY AND COULD RELATE TO IT and I thought about my kids and how it would never happen to them (so I thought). And that one episode in 20 year together freaked you out? Coz I cried?
2. Shortly before my mother died – just as we were about to leave to go back to Asia – I stayed with her after everyone else left the nursing home, because I wanted to say goodbye and I undressed her and put her into bed kissing her goodnight. When I came down to Coldstream to your parents afterwards, they asked me how she was and how I was. She was like a child and I felt the tables had turned when once she would tuck me in at night. I said to your parents how I feel I had lost her already (because she wasn’t the woman I remembered and wished to remember) and your parents turned and said “Mark, you still have Julie and the girls”. No empathy. No “I know, it is sad and you must feel sad about that”. Just “You have Julie and the girls”. Well OF COURSE I DID but this was my mother we were talking about you freaks!
Then, when were in Singapore and your parents were over to see you (you having had left at this point with the kids and rented your apartment with the stolen money), my mother died and all I got from you and your parents (who had been my family too for 20 years) were phone texts saying “Sorry to hear your mum died”. That’s it. Nothing more. She did not even receive flowers at her funeral from any of you! You cold, heartless bastards!
Unresolved emotions? Mine ARE resolved because I actually possess such! You people can’t handle emotions! That’s why everything has to be “just nice”. Pathetic! But it eats away at you!
So, now we’ve covered that meme, let’s look at a couple more you posted and see just how full of shit you are! In the sense that, just like your affidavits, you STILL contradict yourself:
Well, you’ve never apologised and you certainly have never forgiven (for whatever it is I have to be forgiven for that is) and lastly BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST (as your meme above adequately shows) you have neither forgotten nor ignored. And I would go so far as to say you are still vengeful – after all, you are still obviously portraying these lies to our children.
Why do I still feel so sorry for you? If I’m honest, I would have to say it is a throwback to how much I adored you. But I’m not going to be honest because, after all, you certainly aren’t.
And this one says mountains to me Julz about who and what you are today:
A warning? Like the threat to your parents about never seeing the children again if they didn’t do as you asked and support only you 100% during the divorce?
And finally. I need to show you this dear because it is this which supports my accusation (and it is 100% valid) that you are in a bigamist marriage:
Now, you see Julz, let me explain as thoroughly as I possibly can for you:
I have the Singapore documents. All god knows how many thousands of pages of them. And there is one page out of those thousands which states you had applied for a divorce in Singapore based upon Permanent Residency (that document goes back to about April 2005). Then, in April 2006 (while I was in jail for contempt of court because I would not bend to coercion – nothing to do with being a criminal as you told our children) your legal counsel in Singapore (Harry Elias and Partnership) re-submitted a document stating the basis of the jurisdiction was not Permanent Residency but Domicile! They knew they had to change it because, according to the Women’s Charter of Singapore (which is the fundamental document which are the rules set out for divorce – yes folks not the MEN’S charter but the WOMEN’s charter!), the parties to the divorce HAD to be permanent residents in the country for at least a full 2 years before commencement! We, my dear, had only been there for about 9 months or so. OH DEAR! So the document was quietly slipped in to the record while I was in jail so as not to be noticed (yes my lawyer saw it but, as I found out later, he was in on it!).
SINGAPORE WOMEN’S CHARTER
Jurisdiction of court in matrimonial proceedings
93.—(1) Subject to subsection (2), the court shall have jurisdiction to hear proceedings for divorce, presumption of death and divorce, judicial separation or nullity of marriage only if either of the parties to the marriage is —
domiciled in Singapore at the time of the commencement of the proceedings; or
habitually resident in Singapore for a period of 3 years immediately preceding the commencement of the proceedings.
Now, notice what your Barrister, Richard Sear, says in para 6 of the above document so as to give the ENGLISH court jurisdiction over our case:
BOTH PARTIES HAVE PROBABLY ACQUIRED DOMICILE OF CHOISE IN ENGLAND AND WALES.
And when I brought this to the attention of Mr Sear Julz and explained that the Singaporean jurisdiction was based upon us being domiciled in Singapore (which we never were nor could be and he knew it), he ran to you at a rate of knots before coming back to me and saying “What do you want Mr “Earthling””? You see, contrary to what you tell everyone, I did nothing “underhand” at the court that day. I simply told your Barrister some very unfortunate truths and he had a fit!
What I didn’t realise at the time of course (but do now) is that, while this fact on that fateful day in the Royal Courts of Justice saved my financial bacon from a Singaporean order which gave 100% to you, the sheer fact that the jurisdiction of the Singapore court was void, means that we were never legally divorced! Even in Singapore, when I advised my lawyer that I had found the document which stated we were domiciled in Singapore and this could not be correct, he would not act on it even though he admitted I was correct. Again, however, as obvious as it is, I did not realise the enormity of what it meant because I was too stressed out with the entire 3 years proceedings.
Julz, you ARE a bigamist! And not only that, you and your legal team in Singapore purposefully defrauded the Singapore court to achieve what you achieved.
But, as I stated before somewhere. I just want you to know that and I have no intention whatsoever of acting upon it simply because, as I have recently learned in the last few years – THE LAW IS AN ASS. I want nothing to do with it and natural law – that is what the parties themselves want – is more real. You wanted out so enjoy it. But you ARE a bigamist my darling! 😉
And what this meme brings back to me (and what I read from it and your comment) is a similar feeling I got from this email too. A woman desperate to make her man think she’s wonderfully happy but just trying a little too hard to do so:
Damn Julie. The least you could have done was kept me a bit of cake!!
But hey, that’s you all over eh? LOL
Subject: RE: Hannah & Katie
Date: Thu, 30 Jul 2009 06:34:28 +0800
None of your concern where they are . Just like they have no clue as to where you are . And frankly not interested .
We all had a fabulous summer in Edinburgh and Scotland . The girls were stunning bridesmaids at their mum and dads scottish wedding in Edinburgh with friends and family from all over the world. Peter the father they love without question or doubt . . The husband I always dreamed for and love of my life . It was a very special time for us all . [Trying FAR too hard my darling! ;-)]
You will not hear from any of us any more . There is no more *my surname* .
You got your money and ran as I expected . Nothing for them . No help to share in their upbringing . No share of financial responsibility . No gift to make up for lost birthdays and Xmas .
I still loathe you for all you did that had an effect on my daughters .
You are forgotten . The girls are with me home in germany. I will one day fight you for the lost financial support for them . Or perhaps they will . It’s what is right and should have been . You lost them for money but that is what it was all about .! From day one . You can never be dad cos dads don’t do what you did to your own kids . . It’s that simple . Evidently .
Subject: Hannah & Katie
Date: Tue, 14 Jul 2009 13:57:04 +0000
You’re in Scotland? Where are the girls?
But for anyone in Singapore who may read this, let me warn you: The following people should be steered clear of whenever possible:
Of course, if the British Courts weren’t corrupt, Barrister Richard Sear would also be in some trouble because, either by way of ignorance or the determined wish to sweep it all under the carpet, he did not bring to the court’s attention that the Singapore proceedings were void.
Now, by all means Richard, if you wish to make amends for this, I am all ears! After all, I appreciate you recognised the truth in what I was telling you (because it was displayed to you) and you did the right thing to a degree by not letting a barrage of deception and lies destroy me financially. So thanks for that. But……
Meanwhile, as you know honey, this was the reality….
Bali – serenaded at midnight. Who else ever did that? I know honey. You miss the passion. after all, German vorsprung durch technik doesn’t come close. Too bad eh? 😉 x
Subscribe to comments with RSS.